Shemini – Half Time Show

“Human society, the world, and the whole of mankind is to be found in the alphabet.”

Victor Hugo

“I have thought that wild flowers might be the alphabetof angels, — whereby they write on hills and fields mysterious truths, which it is not given our fallen nature to understand.”

Benjamin Franklin

“Somebody said once or wrote, once: ‘We’re all of us children in a vast kindergarten trying to spell God’s name with the wrong alphabet blocks!”

Tennessee Williams

“Ruler of the Universe, I want so much to sing beautiful prayers to you but I am illiterate.  Please, God, take these letters of Your alef-bet and rearrange them to form the words that mean what I want to say to you what is in my heart!”

Jewish Folktale

He really needed a break.  His hand was getting tired; indeed, his whole body was aching.  Not since he fled Egypt on foot forty years earlier (fleeing from a certain homicide allegation) had Moshe experienced such weariness.

Now, up on the mountain, Moshe hadn’t slept or eaten for a long time.  But he was so focused on transcribing God’s Words that time itself seemed to have lost its ordinary meaning.  He wanted to push forward but the cramp in his fingers and legs just wouldn’t stop.

Sensing the physical discomfort of his beloved pupil, God interrupted Himself and Said: “Moshe, Moshe –”

So accustomed was Moshe to being the stenographer that he almost wrote down his name – twice.  But God quickly added, “Put down the quill for a second.  Let’s take a short break so we can chat.”  Moshe happily complied.

“We are coming to a crucial part of My Torah, Moshe”.

“Why is this part of the Torah any more crucial than what has come before or what will come afterwards?”, Moshe asked.  Trying to answer his own question, Moshe continued, “is it because we – er, You – are Dictating specific dietary laws?”

“No”, answered HaShem.  “Those laws are certainly important, but they are JUST as important as the stories in Breishit, krias Yam Suf, and the laws we’ve set down so far.  And what is about to come is no more or less important than what is to come thereafter.”  To make the point, God made the mountain quake a little when He said the word “JUST”.

God Continued: “We are nearing the middle of My Torah.  This is a great milestone, and I Want to make sure that we mark this occasion properly.  Therefore, when you write the next word, גחוֹן, I want you to accentuate the VAV by making it longer than usual.  That will be a mark for all to see that we’ve reached the center letter of My Torah!”

Moshe looked confused so God said, “Let me show you.”  And with that, an image of the verse appeared, floating in the air:

 

 

 

It was subtle but sure enough, Moshe could see that the VAV in גחוֹן (first line, fourth word from the right) was indeed a little bolder and a little more pronounced than the other three VAVs on that line.

Moshe was about to pick up his quill to write גחון as he was commanded when he heard a loud commotion.  He looked up and saw two letters floating hand in hand, desperately trying to get HaShem’s attention.  Moshe recognized the Kaf and the Lamed.  They danced.  They wiggled.  They jumped.  Finally, they made a loud, guttural sound, “CHL”, that sounded (to Moshe) like they were clearing their throats.

The Kaf spoke first.  “We are here to petition You to let one of us be the middle of the Torah”.

“Here we go (again)”, Signed HaShem.  “He we go (again)”, echoed Moshe softly.  They were, of course, remembering how the letters argued with each other – and God – about which one would become the first letter of the Torah (that honor went to Bet) and which one would be carved in stone first on the Luchot (Alef).^[1]

“Make your case”, Declared HaShem.

The Lamed spoke first: “I, Lamed”, represent learning and teaching, which is precisely what is to be done with the precious Torah.  “What’s more, You Created me to look like Moshe’s shepherd’s stick with which You have already brought about so many great miracles.”

God was Impressed but Unmoved.  “My dear Lamed.  You are certainly a deserving letter.  I shall reward you by making you the very last letter, not just in this Torah but also in all of Tanach.”  “Moreover”, God continued, “you will not merely look like Moshe’s rod.  Your name will take on the meaning of a shepherd’s staff!”  (With that, God made a mental note to change a few words around in Sefer Shoftim.)[2]

The Kaf spoke next.  “I respectfully suggest that you let ME be the middle of the Torah”.

“Make your case”, Declared HaShem.

“Way back in Breishit”, said the Kaf, “You made me small.  That, of course, was Your choice.  I did not complain then nor am I complaining now.  But now seems (to me) that this is the perfect opportunity to even things out by making me big!”

Moshe remembered the episode of the little Kaf.  Still, he rolled the unfinished Torah back to Breishit and saw it again for himself.  Sure enough, the Kaf appeared in the last word on the verse much smaller than ordinary.

And Abraham came to mourn for Sarah, and to weep for her.

God Smiled at the Kaf and Spoke gently.  “I could explain why you were written smaller and more delicately there, but that would take away the fun for my future children.  As the Lamed already explained, their job is to study and learn Torah.  That means that they will pour over these words and letters and find hidden treasures.  They will count every verse, and every word, and even every letter[3].  In some ways, this whole Torah is a present waiting to be unwrapped.  And that unwrapping will continue until ….”  HaShem stopped in midsentence lest He reveal too much too soon.

Then He regrouped and added: “Do not view that one time occurrence as a demotion or punishment, my beautiful Kaf!  On the contrary, my children will posit many beautiful lessons from your diminished size.  I predict that your stature will only be elevated!  You will be like a crown (כתר) on My Throne (כסא) of Glory (כבוד).

“And look at the text.  I even lifted you up a bissel off the line of letters there.  I suspended you in mid-air so that everyone would see you and wonder about you.”

“One more thing, dear Kaf.  I shall give you two forms.  You shall sometimes be bent and curved, but you shall also stand tall and erect.  Like a palm of the hand from which you take your named, you can be open or clenched.  You can make peace by greeting another in friendship, or you can defend yourself with a fist (but only when absolutely necessary).”  You can teach My Children when to bow, and when to stand tall, when to fight and when to retreat.”

Before dismissing the Kaf, God Recalled the Lamed and Spoke to the two letters together, just as they had entered hand in hand:

“You may not be the center of my Torah, but you are My eleventh and twelfth letters, making you the center of My of Alef-Bet.  Many years from now, my children will realize that my letters are not merely representations of sounds.  You are numbers too.  You are mathematics and all the physical sciences.  You are philosophy and all the humanities.  You are the music and the lyrics and even the very instruments with which I created My universe.“

“And you, Kaf and Lamed, are smack in the middle of My toolbox.”

“You (two) may not have noticed, but together, as a pair, you spell כֹּל.  You mean everything to Me.  You appear four times in this verse alone, and no less than 5,000 times in my Torah.  כֹּל – everything – is the blessing I gave to Avraham[4] and in a few thousand years, כֹּל will start a poem that inspires a Jewish nation.  Oh, and when you switch sides, you become לך, “Lech”, the word I used to motivate Avraham to leave his birthplace.”

The Kaf and Lamed left with joy in their hearts.

Break time was nearly over.  HaShem was about to instruct Moshe to resume writing but He noticed that something was bothering Moshe.  “Spit it out”, HaShem said.

“OK”, Moshe said, “You silenced the Kaf and Lamed but that still leaves nineteen other letters, each of which could have made a valid claim to be the midpoint of the Torah.  Why did you choose the VAV over any of them?”

HaShem then let Moshe in on a little secret but asked him not to tell anyone else.  “In some ways the choice is arbitrary because I Love All My letters equally.  Each one could make a valid claim.  Choosing the VAV was not an act of favoritism but merely a necessary choice.”

However, God Said Loaudly- and the mountain shook again – the VAV is a perfect choice.  I love her so much that I use her 30,513 times in the Torah, a close second only to the Yud!  Just look at her!  She is long and straight and makes a perfectly good demarcation between the left and right, what came before and what is to come next.”

“But My VAV also has a little curve, a hook on the top so that she can connect two things – just as she means to do when used as the preposition ‘AND’”.

“Because of that subtle hook, I also Use the word VAV to refer to the hooks that will be used to construct the Mishkan.  Just as the sanctity of My House will depend on those hooks, the sanctity of My Torah will depend on the VAV.”

“The VAV connects Me to My children”.  God then asked Moshe to unroll the Torah all the way back to the beginning.  “Look at that first VAV”, Said God.  Moshe did as instructed:

In the beginning of God’s creation of the heavens and the earth.

“See how I saved the VAV to connect My Heavens with My Earth?”

Lastly”, God Said, “My VAV is flexible.  She knows when to be a vowel and when to be a consonant.  She can be shy or outspoken.  She knows when to speak up and when to add harmony to her neighbor’s voice.”

Moshe started to laugh.  “What is so funny?”, God Asked.

“I just realized that the word VAV is written with two VAVs!  it’s as if she is telling us that she is incomplete, waiting for her other half.”

HaShem Liked that Moshe was taking the first steps at being playful with His Torah, but He wanted to make sure that Moshe appreciated that this was also serious stuff.

“The VAV will not always be big and bold and connective.  The time will come when I will Instruct to you break her in half.”

“When will that be?” asked Moshe.

“Soon enough”, answered HaShem.[5]

“Is this really the precise middle of the Torah?”

“That’s the $152,403 question, Moshe”, God Said[6].  “A certain Rav Yosef will one day ask the same question,” God added without elaborating further. [7]

Moshe had many more questions – like why the sinful serpent had slyly slithered into the center of the scripture[8] – but they would have to wait.

Shabbat Shalom!

 

[1]. “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery that mediocrity can pay to greatness.”  So said Oscar Wilde.  This essay borrows the well-known midrashic tool of bringing the Hebrew letters alive by giving them giving unique character traits and personalities.  See, e.g., Midrash Otiyot D’Rabbi Akiva.

[2].  See, Shoftim 3:31.

[3]. See, TB Kiddushin 30a.

[4]. See, Gen. 24:1.

[5]. See, Dev. 25:13.

[6] See, generally, https://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/1883118/jewish/What-Is-the-Midpoint-of-the-Torah.htm  :

A Torah scroll contains 304,805 letters, which means that the midpoint would be the 152,403rd letter; but there are 157,236 letters until the letter vav in the word gachon. In order for that to be the middle letter of the Torah, there would have to be an additional 9,667 letters in the Torah scroll!

[7] See, TB Kiddushin 30a.

[8] See, Rashi on Lev. 11:42; see, also, Gen. 3:14.